Dear Apple.

We are writing regarding a very problematic software failure, namely, the lack of the "typewriter emoji", which we feel to be unreasonable, unconscionable and, mainly, unconstitutional. It is simply unjust to include a pager, a rolodex and a fax machine, which are unsightly objects, and exclude one of the greatest inventions of all time. 

We are urging that your programmers come to their senses and restore some sanity to this absolute madness. 

Thank you.