dogs rights

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Update posted 21 hours ago

Petition to Jeanna Trotman, Zach Trotman, The Trotmans

Let Murphy bring a stick into the house for once!

Murphy (I assume your last name is) Trotman. We see your struggle. We know your pain. We feel for you and we are here for you if only to secure one isolated moment of joy for a dog so care-free and loving in intent, and relentlessly persistent in the pursuit of simple pleasures. Have you ever had a dream? Has the glint of a better life ever set you on an immovable course? Transformed you into an unshakable force? Changed your condition to the point that your mind interpreted even the most impenetrable obstacles as children's playground equipment? Enter Murphy, the jovial German Shepherd. Murphy is among the goodest of boys. He enjoys time with family (one sister and two parents, whom he loves very much), attacking vacuums, and going on walks outside. The latter cause is the inspiration for this petition and the accompanying, exhaustive description. Murphy is taken outside often to adventure, romp around, and more-than-likely burn off some extra energy before returning to an orderly home. For as long as he can remember, he has always found enjoyment in sticks he finds on the return trip to the house. These sticks vary in size, circumference, species, and weight, but one variable remains constant across all types... The profound feeling of delight they provide. Without fail and on every trip you can find Murphy Trot-ing toward the Trotman residence with a newly acquired branch. To Murphy's dismay, every trip results in the dastardly reminder that there are no sticks allowed inside... As it is known, German Shepherds aren't the most social of dog breeds; however, they are extremely loyal to those they choose to befriend. An owner, maybe. Perhaps another dog that happens to share the same household and family. Possibly even... A fragment of a nearby tree? As outsiders, who are we to decide which friendships are valid and which should be cast aside at a moment's notice for the sake of over-working a Roomba? "Friend" has previously been defined as "a familiar or helpful thing". After countless trips outdoors, Murphy has become familiar with enough kindling to melt the polar ice caps himself (which would be terrible, climate change is real). Sticks that entertain, stems that calm, branches that make his doggone day. Unfortunately, as familiar as he gets with these herbal dismemberments, he is all-to-familiar with the anguish that comes next. Still, in an act of optimism only capable of a canine, Murphy scampers home hoping for a change of the human heart. "No!" It is a wonder he doesn't answer to it by now. A word so easily uttered, yet so heavy when it lands. Murphy's ears depress and the lively gleam fades from his eyes, teeth gnashing. And so, as every day before, he is forced to abandon his new-found friend at the base of the Trotman stoop. A saddened saunter up the steps signals another day's loss. We are here today fighting a battle for the voiceless and incapable. We don't ask for much, just one simple exception where a rule otherwise remains rigid: let Murphy carry a stick into the house one time. We believe this to be a fair exchange for his unconditional love and the non-consensual exploitation of his handsomeness, loyalty, and fervor (and yes, even his untimely and misplaced bowel movements) online. If you share our same passion for this cause, the dog it defends, and the opportunity to do good in the world, we implore you to sign and spread this petition.

Neil Larson
548 supporters