Change the date of Wrestlemania because we need Knightmage at C2E2!
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Dear Mr. McMahon,
As I am sure you are probably aware, Wrestlemania 34 is taking place this year on April 8th in New Orleans. I am writing to you because this causes a very serious problem: it means Michael "Knightmage" Wilson will be unable to attend C2E2 as it takes place on the same weekend.
Now, I know you are probably thinking right now, "Is it that big a deal if Knightmage can't make it to C2E2 this year?" to which I would say, while it would be sad and disappointing if Knightmage were to miss one C2E2, what makes this a crisis of epic proportions is that last year Mr. Mage had the honor of representing our country at a convention overseas and was thus forced to miss last year's also. As you probably already know, some people have interpreted the Book of Revelations to say that Knightmage missing two C2E2s in a row as being like, the 5th or 6th sign of the apocalypse.
Let me point out that if the apocalypse comes, that means no more Wrestlemania.
If you are wondering, "Can't C2E2 just move its date and avert the apocalypse?" I would point out that C2E2 takes place in the city of Chicago. Do you know how many levels of bureaucracy one must go through to get anything done in Chicago? It takes a notarized form, completed in triplicate, witnessed by a union member just to be able to customize a Big Mac! Most estimates put getting any sort of date change for C2E2 done taking roughly 200-250 years, which would be moot because of, you know, that whole apocalypse thing.
Therefore, I am appealing directly to you, the one man who can get things done and get them done quickly. Please, Mr. McMahon, even though your character on RAW seems like one who very well might revel in being responsible for the end of all life on Earth, I think that you are probably, in real life, a slightly kinder soul. Please help avert this catastrophe!
Stephen "Stormio" Ormins
(ps- yes, I know, the nickname is kinda lame. That's what happens when you decide you need one for a facebook cosplay page and are in a bit of a rush.)
(pps- If changing the date of Wrestlemania is too problematic because it would throw off all the writing for coming storylines, I would also accept you moving the event to Chicago. Probably the United Center. I realize the Blackhawks and Bulls both play the days before, but think of the possibilities: The first ever Wrestlemania on ice!)
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