On September 30th during my first period class kids at my school were making transphobic jokes. They were making “attack helicopter” jokes, joking about bottom surgery, joking about “legally” changing their gender and more. The TA (teachers assistant) was encouraging this behavior. I was the only transgender student in the room. The student who was leading these “jokes” made a joke about changing their pronouns to it/it’s. The TA said that it/it’s pronouns do not exist and was a nickname and laughed. I said that it/it’s pronouns do exist and I personally know people who go by them. She argued with me saying she has “gay, transgender and transsexual friends” and she looked it up and I was wrong. I was extremely frustrated and I felt unsafe in the classroom. I asked for “support” from another staff and vented to them about the situation.

Shortly after I asked if I could have a circle up with that TA to talk about the situation and how it affected me. Right when we all sat down (Me, my social worker, the TA and support) the TA said if I don’t speak then she’ll leave because she doesn’t want to waste and I’m a senior so I have to learn to speak for myself. I have really bad social anxiety so it’s hard for me to speak up sometimes. The entire conversation she extremely aggressive and kept misgendering me. She said nobody uses it/it’s pronouns because they don’t exist. I told her I have multiple friends who do and she said “no you don’t” and rolled her eyes. She then called me an “it.” She kept defending herself because she’s a big ally to the LGBTQ+ community and she knows transgender people. As a transgender person, she should be listening to me as to why I’m telling her why I felt unsafe and why what she’s saying is insensitive. She told me she feels uncomfortable because she has to “walk on eggshells” so she doesn’t upset me.

I was extremely triggered and these experiences had led me to having to get picked up due to the state I was in. I could not breathe properly, I was shaking, sobbing and felt like I was going to pass out. My hands went numb. I should not feel this way because of school staff. This is just one of many experiences of transphobia I have went through at the villa. 

I am tired of my friends and myself being told we don’t exist. I am tired of being misgendered while talking about how much it affects me and other trans kids at my school. I feel unsafe going to school and have voiced this and the school did nothing to ensure my safety. I have been voicing my concerns about this school for the last two years. I am tired of feeling this way. This school is for mental health and behavioral issues and it’s extremely frustrating that the staff have little training on mental heath. They have little training on the LGBTQ+ community yet they’re always telling us it’s a safe place for us. (especially on their website.) I do not feel safe at this school. Many kids feel unsafe at this school. The transphobia towards me has been happening since I came out to the school over a year ago and I am drained. I have been told staff have to “walk on eggshells so they don’t upset me.” This is discrimination. I have been told that they have to “be careful” to not upset me by misgendering me. I’m heartbroken that it has come to this. I am heartbroken that I have attempted suicide because of the amount of hate towards me at this school just because of my gender identity.

I am transgender and I am proud. I will not change for you. I will continue advocating for me and other trans kids at this school until there is a change.