Force Jaime Garcia to Grow His Mustache Back

Force Jaime Garcia to Grow His Mustache Back

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Andrew Neubauer started this petition to US Congress and

Jaime Garcia is a man who, until this morning, had a upper lip that oozed the cool authority of a 70s-style police investigator with a knee length London Fog trenchcoat. Last night he willfully shaved this salute to justice, and like a proud bald eagle being punched on national TV, scandal swept the nation. It is my very real concern that unless this is addressed, Jaime will be disregarded by children and assaulted by the elderly. Help me undo this injustice by forcing a man to grow facial hair.

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