Johnathan "Saintster" Goldwitzstein, a prominent Art King and humanitarian to orphaned centipedes and squirrels, was unjustly banned by the anti-semitic, racist bigot known as Raphael "Nosebro" Broheim. Saintster was a lifelong advocate of rectal housing for innocent animals orphaned or crippled by motor vehicles driven by the slant-eyed yellow peoples of eastern asia.  He was a gentle giant beloved by all who lived in the Art Kings Discord server. However, Saintster's love for the other creatures of God was not appreciated by all. Opposed to this great philanthropist was Nosebro, an anti-semitic caecillian with no employment since 1983 who often went on racist or anti-semitic rants after ingesting household cleaning products such as Febreze™ or Pine-Sol™. One day, after downing an entire bottle of Listerine Ultraclean ARCTIC MINT™, Nosebro went on an especially egregious rant, insulting Saintster's irish heritage, calling him derogatory names and claiming that the irish potato famine was a fabrication thought of by the irish government to secure sympathy for the irish people. He went on to say that the irish were not in fact white people, and that there should be nuclear wars done against them. Saintster's mother had died in the irish potato famine after slipping on a potato skin and landing butt first on a petrified pickle, and he took great offense at Nosebro's rant but he held his breath out of politeness for his fellow man. However, this was not the end of Nosebro's wrath. Lifting his AIDs-ridden left arm, he whipped out his fecal-covered banhammer and banished Saintster to the dimension of video games, where Saintster was sure to never ever accomplish anything in his life ever again.

To this day, Saintster has remained banned, lacking the light of god to set things right in his life. He has turned to abusing canned air and cleaning products to ease the suffering of being in the video games dimension. Since he was banned, he has put on 80 kg of bodyfat, a danger to his internal organs and skeletal structure.

Signing this petition will apparently magically unban Saintster even though it's basically just a piece of digital toilet paper and does absolutely nothing to help anyone in the real world.