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A Bidet for Every Bathroom (In Roman Gardens)

This petition had 39 supporters

With the recent announcement of the change in ownership and remodeling of Roman Gardens, as affected renters, we would like to offer a piece of input to the new owners. While new furniture, paint and even the promised washer and dryer are find and good, there is one change that is of paramount importance in the new remodel…the integration of bidets in all bathrooms within the complex. We base this request on three premises. 1. The harmful effects of toilet paper. 2. The sanitary benefits of bidets. 3. The economic and status benefits of bidets.

1.       The Harmful effects of toilet paper

Many users of toilet paper are not conscious of the many harmful effects of toilet paper on the environment, their bodies, and their relationships. Deforestation is one of the major contributing factors to climate change. According to the NRDC (National Resources Defense Council) white toilet paper tissue accounts for 15% of deforestation (Worldwatch). By switching to bidets, Roman Gardens could help prevent 50lbs of toilet paper (that’s 2.8 miles worth) from being flushed per resident per year (GOOD). Bidets are not just gentle on the environment, but on our bodies as well. Bidets can greatly reduce the chance of getting hemorrhoids since the rectum is not being rubbed raw by toilet paper. Think hemorrhoids are awkward? That’s nothing compared to the shame of running out of toilet paper because your roommates are passive-aggressively hoping another roommate will buy the toilet paper…or worse, the awkwardness of being that roommate who demands that everyone pay them back for the trashy one-ply they brought home last week. All of these harmful effects of toilet paper can be avoided through the adoption of bidets throughout the complex.

2.       The Sanitary Benefits of Bidets

80% of all infectious disease comes from skin to skin contact. Only 50% of people wash hands correctly after using the bathroom (Honey Coloney). Handless bidet usage would drastically reduce illness by eliminating contact between the hands and fecal matter. The reduction of infectious disease transfer via skin to skin contact directly translates to healthier residents. Healthier residents mean healthier, more productive students and workers. Healthier, more productive students and workers means a healthier and stronger economy AND future. Suddenly, using a bidet is not only sanitary but patriotic.

3.       The Economic Benefits of Bidets

While the addition of bidets to each bathroom in the complex would incur an additional cost to the new ownership, this cost would be minimal seeing as you can find bidets for as cheap as $100 (Scientific American). In addition to the previous benefits of bidet ownership, installing bidets could have significant other economic ramifications on the apartment and its branding. With a 50% increase in requests for bidets in new homes within the last year alone (LA Times), it is obvious that bidets are the new up and coming bathroom technology, being embraced by the elite and forward thinking. By adopting the bidet, Roman Gardens would brand itself as the trendy and forward-thinking housing option in Provo.

At the end of the day, the logic and benefits of bidet use wash away any reason to oppose their adoption. Between the harmful effects of toilet paper, and the sanitary and economic benefits of bidets, bidets are clearly the #1 way to deal with #2. We hope the new management will see, as we do, that the benefits of including bidets in the remodel plans are a very cheap way to provide a butt-load of benefits to their residents.

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Michael Nixon needs your help with “The new owners of Roman Gardens: A Bidet for Every Bathroom (In Roman Gardens)”. Join Michael and 38 supporters today.