Ban the 'floss'

Ban the 'floss'

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Orlando Dabner started this petition to Scott Morrison

The floss is a dance which grew in popularity after appearing in the videogame 'Fortnite'. Following the cult following that this game accrued, the horrific and offensive dance became common across the entire world. We need to ban this dance because people are actually dying when they see it.

It has been scientifically proven that the 'floss' can cause strokes and/or heart attacks in men and women over the age of 12. All children under the age of 12 have been found to dance along when shown the dance.

The study was conducted at Monash University. Three thousand people over the age of 12 were tested, and five hundred people under the age of 12 were tested. Approximately 78% of people over the age of 12 when shown the floss suffered from an increased heart rate, and 23% suffered from stroke-related illness. Twelve participants were rushed to hospital after heart attacks.

This has been atributed to the movement of the arms and hands in conjunction with the body. This particular movement can affect the brain and cause epileptic activity, overwhelming the cerebral cortex and causing dangerously high heart activity.

100% of the participants under the age of 12 remained completely healthy with no side effects or changes in their mental and physical wellbeing. 10% of the participants began to dance along, which means that flossing is a national threat which could, given time, affect thousands, if not millions of Australian citizens.

I propose the immediate ban of the floss and a fine of $50-700 if the floss is seen in public by police.

Please help me end years of suffering at a horrific and life-threatening dance. Sign the petition today.

 

Sincerely,

Orlando Dabner

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