Follow Scientific Consensus Or Else We Will Block Out The Sun Across The US On Monday
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Dear President Trump and fellow Republicans,
We, supporters of science, are alarmed at the ways in which you have recklessly ignored science. In response, if you do not accede to our demands (listed below), we will block out the sun across the United States on Monday, August 21st. If you wish to Make America Great Again, you ought to meet our demands so that it is not shrouded in darkness in the middle of the day. And if you do not meet our demands, and you witness our wrath on Monday, please be aware of that there will be other threats that we plan to make good on if you still do not take action, such as massive flooding in Florida, excessive heat and drought in Arizona, and all the glaciers in the continental US melting. This is no joke.
Admit the that climate change is caused by humans and has the potential to cause great harm across the planet
Reinstate full US commitment to Paris Accord
Remove Scott Pruitt as head of EPA and ensure its full funding
Remove Rick Perry and appoint Ernest Moniz as Head of DOE
Remove Sam Clovis and appoint an actual scientist for top USDA scientist post
Support scientists in all areas of government
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