Alternate side street cleaning in New York City does not work as a program for street cleaning. It is entirely dysfunctional, the streets do not get cleaned and the citizens of New York City are being unlawfully punished, both in the form of ticketing and time wasting.

1. Cleaning trucks do not come by at all 90% of the time. The street is not being cleaned at the frequency indicated by the street signs.
2. Moreover, the trucks designed for cleaning do not actually clean anything. In the off chance that they do come by, all they do is swirl around big garbage-juice soaked brushes leaving behind a trail of stink.
3. More often than not, a ticket officer will come by to hand out tickets while the cleaning truck does not come at all. This is clear extortion. We cannot accept being ticketed for preventing a service that has not occurred. 
4. The cumulative human hours spent sitting in a car for absolutely no real purpose is unacceptable. This is a waste of time for the citizens of New York City who do not even get to enjoy clean streets after giving up hours and days of their lives each year for this non-service. This is quite possibly the biggest transgression of this program.
5. Hundreds of thousands of vehicles are idling for hours each week to wait for cleaning trucks that never come and to avoid being ticketed. The cumulative amount of gas being burned and gasses being deposited into the air are completely unnecessary. This is an entirely absurd contributor to the ongoing environmental crisis.

The proposal is to completely reinvent this program in a way that actually fulfills its purpose. 

1. Trucks for street cleaning need to be designed in such a way that they actually clean the street. Street cleaning services in other major cities do not require individuals to move their cars at all. There are multiple different options for street cleaning trucks available, all of which are better than the current trucks being utilized. The resources allocated to this program need to be used to maximize the intended effect.
2. The street cleaning schedule needs to take on a more realistic shape. Currently the street gets cleaned approximately 5 times per year, despite the minimum once weekly schedule posted. The posted schedule, which is not followed, is far too frequent, and the actual realized schedule is far too infrequent. The street should be cleaned monthly or bi monthly, but the trucks must actually show up and do the job.
3. Residents of a neighborhood should have priority in street parking within that neighborhood. Like most other major cities, residential parking permits must be issued. 
4. CITIZENS SHOULD NOT BE REQUIRED TO PAY A FINE IF NO CLEANING SERVICE HAS BEEN ATTEMPTED.
5. CITIZENS SHOULD NOT BE REQUIRED TO SIT IN THEIR IDLING CARS EVERY WEEK FOR A SERVICE THAT DOES NOT TAKE PLACE.

We all would like to have clean streets, we all pay taxes that fund these programs in order that our streets would be clean. The reality is that our streets are not being cleaned and the citizens of New York City are being extorted and punished by departments funded by these very citizens. 

We demand that our tax money be used correctly and efficiently. We should not be punished for the incompetency of the department, intentional or not. Furthermore, we should not be willing to accept clear extortion.

This is a petition to overhaul the street cleaning program in New York City. This affects all citizens of New York City, and disproportionately so car owning individuals.