Dear comrades,

The united citizens of New Zealand and the world, dignified and humble, seek to Petition Parliament to rename New Zealand. 

Our dear benevelent leader Aunty Cindy has been doing such a mighty fine job of managing her team of five million Kindergartners. So much so that we want to rename New Zealand in her honour!

Instead of Aotearoa. Why not Cindy's Kindy? In recognition of the world's largest and most magnificent Kindergarten. 

Such a profound change will send a strong virtue signal to the world that we are a working so hard towards the perfect socialist utopia.  To show that in contrast to, and despite of every other attempt in history leading to tyranny and starvation, we are goose-stepping our way towards peace and prosperity - where we own nothing and are happy.

By renaming, we also hope to inspire other world leaders to treat their citizens like children. To let the world know that it's OK to ground anybody, or everybody, for anything! Especially if it's for their precious Health and Safety. Everyone knows kids can't be responsible for themselves. And if they act up you can just send them away to camp where they can practise their concentration skills.

Aunty also gives us super interesting lessons where we learn to trust the science. Not the actual science, that's for her experts, but we learn how to get into the mindset of a frightened,  gullible child so we can trust it.

By modelling the nation state on the hierarchy of a kindergarden it delivers social justice, and solves climate change because kids can't drive cars. Best of all, no one has to work because everything is free, or at least it will be once we have perfected Communism. There's still homework of course, but we don't get paid for that.

This petition also aims to bestow the noble title of "Principal" to the leader of our school. If successful we will launch another petition to endow the Principal with new powers, like putting pupils in time-out and abolishing private property rights through heavy taxation, excuse me, I mean "school fees". Oh wait hang on I thought everything was free. Errrr... it's ok we will sort it out after the communist revolution. Or maybe we'll do facism instead. Who knows, let's see. Either way it's gonna be awesome.

Be kind. Except, of course, to anybody who hasn't been brainwashed yet. Then you can throw a toddler tantrum and say whatever you want, because remember it's not hate speech when we do it.

Cindy's Kindy for a new world order!

Yay!!!