Prevent a land-slide win for the Tories
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My wife and her NCT group do not go out together often but each time they do it ends in global calamity. Their recent expeditions include the evening of 22 June 2016 and 7 November 2016, the day before the Brexit referendum and Donald Trumps victory in the US Presidential elections respectively.
I am not sure exactly what happens during these NCT outings or how they effect global political events so directly. I can't even be 100% sure that there is a causal link but the evidence is, I think you'll agree, compelling.
The revelation of this curious relationship between the antics of my wife's NCT friends and world events might just be an interesting foot note in the annals of time. However, they have (for many weeks and independently of Teresa May's decision to call a snap election), been planning an evening out on 8th June - the day of the British General election. Given the chronology of this group's social outings in the past, this cannot be a coincidence.
So it seems to that the choice is stark. Either we allow events to unfold as they are scheduled to, giving Teresa May the mandate to impose brutal and heartless ideologically driven conservative economic policy on our country. Or petition my wife to cancel her trip out with her NCT group, thereby reigning in the seemingly unlimited power that the group has to engineer right-wing political upheaval on the world.
Please sign my petition, for all our sakes.
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