Martha Stewart: Learn how to take photos that aren't horrible with your iPhone
Martha Stewart's iPhone photos are a travesty (true) and have killed three people (not true).
Examples of her photos:
Please sign this petition in the spirit of an intervention.
We love/like/respect you, Martha, but we can no longer stand by while you steal our joy with your iPhone photos. GET THE HELP YOU NEED.
We want you to live, Martha. Really live.