Make Ed Move to Nevada if the Raptors Lose in 6

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Dear Friends -

On May 29th 2019, Edward Birnbaum put something shocking out into the universe that cannot be taken back. During a daily team meeting he stated openly his prediction that the Raptors will lose the finals in 6 games. As if stating it were not enough, he wrote it down for the record to ensure his bragging rights were protected. Unshaken by criticism, he went on with his day as if nothing were wrong. As if he hadn't just disturbed the alignment of the universe.

According to a recent poll, 47 of 50 states are supporting the Raptors. The three states supporting Golden State are California, Hawaii, and Nevada. Following a conversation with Ed this week I learned that, as a perennial urban snob, he has a great disdain for the state of Nevada. Therefore, I hope you will join me in ensuring that Ed be exiled from Toronto and move to Nevada should his prediction come true.

This petition is to serve as notice to Ed that his actions will have an equal and opposite reaction. His prediction, his bragging rights, will also be his downfall. Please sign this petition to put Ed in his place and right the wrong that he has put out into the universe.

By signing this petition you are supporting your city, your colleagues, and most importantly the Raptors as they push to make history for our great northern nation. 

Please support, sign, and spread widely!

 


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