Ask John Oliver to Cover Aliyev
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As Americans, 2020 provided an ample supply of existential threats to brood over: the Coronavirus, the presidential election, murder hornets (really, look it up). But on September 27th, Armenians around the world were unfortunate enough to add "Armo-geddon" to the list when Azerbaijan attacked the neighboring Artsakh - an independent republic between Armenia and Azerbaijan inhabited by approximately 150,000 Armenians.
Azerbaijan is like North Korea, with oil. Aliyev, the Kim Jong-un of the Middle East, desperate to legitimize his inheritance to the presidency, invaded Artsakh to distract from the internal dissent plaguing his country. Sith Lord Erdogan is not-so-subtly encouraging Aliyev to attack Artsakh with Postmated Syrian terrorists. And, after years of military aid, Erdogan is finally taking off the training wheels and letting Aliyev ride the dictator bike full speed further down the authoritarian hill.
With this petition, we ask that John Oliver cover this authoritarian regime through his insightful and independent investigative journalism on Last Week Tonight.
Here are some fun-facts about Azerbaijan:
1. Azerbaijan changed their constitution to allow Aliyev's wife to be Vice President. An Aliyev has been in power for over 30 years. He is President, his wife is Vice President, and his dad is the former president . . . national meetings in Azerbaijan are really just family reunions.
2. John Oliver observed that dictators love pointless Guinness World Records. Turkmenistan has the world's largest indoor ferris wheel and Saudi Arabia has the largest flagpole. Baku also set a record when it erected the world's largest flag. Unfortunately, according to Radio Free Europe, it "had to be quickly taken down" as its huge erection "began to sag precariously." Aliyev, whose regime is sponsored by Cialis, has taken to the favorite past-time of every dictator facing a midlife crisis. Well, that and genocide.
3. Aliyev achieved elite dictator status when in 2013 he was named "Corruption's Person of the Year" by Transparency International. Sacha Baron Cohen made a documentary film about Aliyev's achievements in 2012. "
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