Jeff Bezos To Cover Vatican City In Paul Blart Stickers
Jeff Bezos To Cover Vatican City In Paul Blart Stickers
Jeff Bezos is very rich man.
Fun Fact: On review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes, Paul Blart Mall Cop holds a rating of 33% based on 114 reviews, and an average rating of 4.6/10. The website's consensus reads, "Paul Blart: Mall Cop has some laughs, but its plot is flimsy and lacking in any sustained comic momentum. On Metacritic, the film has a score of 39 out of 100, based on 24 critics, indicating "generally unfavorable reviews" Roger Ebert of the Chicago Sun Times gave it three stars out of four, praising the film's "wholesome" comedy.
He is the owner of Amazon and earns £216000000 (For you yankees that is $275000000) A DAY. Redbubble.com sells various user made products including Paul Blart Mall Cop stickers; these feature the renowned actor James Kevin playing his most recognised, lovable goofball of the unlikely hero archetype, and here is the entire plot (if i recall correctly)
Paul Blart lives in West Orange, New Jersey, with his teenage daughter, Maya, and mother, Margaret. Aspiring to join the New Jersey State Police, he trains at the police academy, but his hypoglycemic medical condition causes him to collapse, therefore failing the exam. To shape up for his career, Blart works as a security guard at the fictional West Orange Pavilion Mall.
Blart patrols the mall on a Segway to assure that things are safe and clean. He also trains Veck Simms, who is new but uninterested in the job. Meanwhile, Blart becomes acquainted with Amy Anderson, the vendor of a new kiosk. He meets her one evening at a party at Joe's American Bar and Grill with other mall employees. Things initially go well, but Blart is sidetracked when he decides to participate in a nacho-eating contest with his friend Leon. The hot and spicy salsa is more than Blart can handle, causing him to inadvertently drink several alcoholic beverages. He ruins the party and makes a wild exit by falling through a window.
Two days later, on the night of Black Friday, an organized gang of thugs disguised as Santa's Village employees begin what appears to be a bank heist inside the mall. They take Amy and other customers in the bank hostage. Simms is revealed as the gang's leader – his mall security job was a ploy to gather intelligence. They are keeping the hostages as insurance for the gang's escape. The crew force shoppers to exit the mall and strategically place motion sensors around each entrance to detect any attempt to enter or exit the building.
Blart takes a break in the arcade and plays "Detroit Rock City" via Rock Band. He eventually walks back out in the mall, and discovers the entire mall is evacuated and under a state of emergency. Upon realizing this, he calls the police, and slips out of the mall to speak with Commander Sergeant Howard. Blart realizes Amy is still inside after spotting her car in the parking lot, and decides to return to the mall to look for her. A SWAT team arrives with Commander James Kent at the helm. Kent, a former classmate and bully from Blart's childhood, takes control of the police units and orders Blart to let them handle the situation. Blart refuses and attempts a rescue. Vastly outnumbered and physically outclassed, Blart takes a stand against Simms' crew using improvised measures to take them down one by one. He discovers credit card codes written in invisible ink on the burglars' arms and realizes that their real plans go beyond robbing the bank.
Maya, unaware of what has happened, shows up at the mall on her way to bring Blart some food, but Simms' remaining henchmen seize her and add her to the hostage group. Blart manages to subdue all of Simms' accomplices and attempts to evacuate the hostages by pulling them up through an air vent. The plan fails when Leon does not fit. Simms enters the room, capturing Blart and forcing him to give up the credit card codes he recorded on his cell phone. Simms flees, taking Amy and Maya with him. As police raid the mall to apprehend the criminals and rescue the hostages, Blart borrows a display minivan and joins Kent in pursuing Simms to the airport, where he is attempting to escape to the Cayman Islands.
After a brief scuffle, Blart overpowers Simms and puts him in handcuffs. Moments later, however, Kent pulls his gun on Blart, revealing that he was in cahoots with Simms. Kent demands the phone containing the codes from Blart, who refuses and destroys the phone. Before Kent can retaliate by shooting Blart, Chief Brooks of the mall security team arrives and shoots Kent in the arm. Kent and Simms are arrested, and Amy and Maya are returned safely. For his bravery and assistance, Howard offers Blart a job with the West Orange Police Department. Blart inexplicably declines, preferring to remain in mall security. Blart and Amy are eventually married in the mall, where they exchange vows on a set of black and white Segways.
Oh, and here is the entire plot for Paul Blart Mall Cop 2, just to get you invested:
Paul Blart (James Kevin) narrates his several misfortunes and his hard recovery. His wife Amy (Jayma Mays) divorced him six days into their marriage and to feel better, Paul takes pride in patrolling the West Orange Pavilion Mall. Two years later, his mother Margaret (Shirley Knight) was killed after being hit by a milk truck. Four years after that, as Paul narrates "he had officially peaked", he receives an invitation to a security officers' convention in Las Vegas and begins to believe his luck is about to change. His daughter Maya Blart (Raini Rodriguez <3) discovers that she was accepted into UCLA and plans to move across the country to Los Angeles, but in light of her father's invitation, she decides to withhold the information for now.
After arriving in Las Vegas, Paul and his daughter meet the general manager of Wynn Hotel, a pretty young woman named Divina Martinez (Daniella Alonso), to whom Paul is instantly attracted. He later learns that she's dating the hotel's head of security, Eduardo Furtillo (Eduardo Verástegui). Meanwhile, Maya and the hotel's valet, Lane (David Henrie) become instantly attracted to each other. A security guard from the Mall of Americaattending the convention, Donna Ericone (Loni Love), is aware of Paul's earlier heroics in the West Orange Pavilion Mall incident and believes Paul will be the likely keynote speaker at the event. However, Paul discovers that another security guard, Nick Panero (Nicholas Turturro), is giving the speech.
In the midst of the convention, a criminal named Vincent Sofel (Neal McDonough) and a gang of accomplices disguised as hotel employees are secretly plotting to steal priceless works of art from the hotel and replace them with replicas, then sell the real ones at auction. In the meantime, Paul has become overprotective of Maya after discovering her flirting with Lane and spies on their conversations. He is later mocked by Eduardo for his lack of professionalism in an event where hotel security was notified when Maya turns up missing. In an ensuing argument with her father, Maya boldly claims she's attending UCLA despite Paul's wishes that she remain close to home at a junior college.
At the convention, Paul, Donna, and three other security guards, Saul Gundermutt (Gary Valentine), Khan Mubi (Shelly Desai), and Gino Chizzeti (Vic Dibitetto) check out the non-lethal security equipment on display. Later, Paul finds Panero drunk hitting on a woman at the bar. Paul attempts to defuse the situation and Panero passes out, giving Paul a chance to be the event's speaker. He contacts Maya asking her to attend, but he learns that she's at a party with Lane. As Paul prepares his speech, Vincent and his cohorts put their plan into motion. Maya absentmindedly walks into the midst of the heist and is taken hostage. Lane is kidnapped as well while searching for her. After a brief fight with an ill-tempered bird in the hotel garden, Paul gives a rousing speech that moves everyone at the convention, as well as Divina, who inexplicably finds herself becoming more attracted to Paul with each passing moment. Following the speech, Paul learns about Maya and Lane's situation and rushes to help but passes out due to his hypoglycemic condition that has plagued him for years.
After recovering, Paul is able to take down several of Vincent's thugs and gathers intel on the group's intentions. Using non-lethal equipment from the convention, he is able to take out more of Vincent's crew. Meanwhile, Maya and Lane overhear Vincent adamantly refusing an oatmeal cookie due to a severe oatmeal allergy. Working with a team – Donna, Saul, Khan, and Gino – Paul is able to clumsily dismantle Vincent's operation, with Maya severely incapacitating Vincent by rubbing oatmeal-infused concealer on his face. Afterward, Paul convinces Divina that her attraction for him is misplaced, and Eduardo is whom she should really be with. Paul also accepts Maya going to UCLA, funding her tuition with the reward money he obtained from Steve Wynn for stopping Vincent. After dropping off Maya at UCLA, Paul falls in love with a passing Mounted Police Officer who reciprocates his advances.
Anyway, back to business.
Fun Fact: The film ranked #1 at the domestic box office with $9,791,368 from 3,144 theaters for an opening day average of $3,105. During the film's entire three-day opening weekend, the film remained at the top spot, grossing a total of $31,832,636, with a per screen average of $10,125, outgrossing its $26 million budget. It grossed $39,234,238 over the entire four-day MLK weekend, for a four-day average of $12,479. The film was the second best opening of all-time for the MLK weekend, behind 2008's Cloverfield. The film stayed at number one in its second weekend, grossing another $21,623,182, dropping just 32%, and boosting the ten day income to $64,923,380. In its third weekend it dropped to second place with $13,872,751, a 36% decline from the last weekend, for an average of $4,327 from 3,206 theaters, bringing the seventeen day gross to $83,247,655. In its fourth weekend, it dropped to fifth place with $10,884,825, a drop of 22% from the last weekend, for an average of $3,435 from 3,169 theaters, and bringing the 24-day tally to $96,886,687. In its fifth weekend (President's Day weekend), it dropped to sixth place, making another $10,983,319 over the three-day span, actually increasing 1%, for an average of $3,704 from 2,965 theaters, and bringing the 31-day total to $109,787,819, having broken the $100 million mark on Friday February 13. Over the four-day President's Day weekend, it made $13,574,027 for an average of $4,578, and bringing the 32-day cume to $112,388,524.The film closed on Monday, May 25, 2009, with a final domestic gross of $146,336,178, with the three-day opening weekend making up 21.75% of the total gross (26.81% for the four-day opening weekend). The film has also so far made $36,625,591 internationally, bringing the total worldwide gross to $183,293,131, against a modest $26 million budget.
Vatican City is the smallest country on Earth and is only 0.44 square kilometers. The sticker that we had in mind was 0.000000123176 square kilometers, albeit an irregular shape. This means that we would require 3572125 stickers (maybe a few more since they are oddly shaped as I mentioned before HAHA) to cover the entirety of Vatican City.
Fun Fact: Paul Blart: Mall Cop was released on DVD, Blu-ray, and UMD on May 19, 2009. The DVD sold 1,817,747 copies, making US $29,411,146 for the week of May 24, 2009, having only been out for six days, and it ranked #1 for DVD sales that week as well. For the week of May 31, 2009, it again made #1 on the US DVD Charts as it sold an additional 553,681 copies and making US $9,921,964 for a total of 2,834,826 units sold with earnings of US $46,676,902 as of November 1, 2009. As of November 1, 2009, when combined with box office results and total DVD sales, the film has grossed a total of US $227,126,523.
Now we have considered that there are buildings that might get in the way, but we thought that a nice country wide riot would sort that out. Alternatively, we could give the buildings a good, fresh, new coating of Paul Blart Mall Cop stickers. We could also (if my boy Jeff was willing to splash out) buy the entire country of Vatican City, since then we could just demolish the building and make a flat (maybe tourist attraction) area of Paul Blart Mall Cop stickers.
Fun Fact: Doin' It Right (Delta Mix) by Steve Azar plays during the credits, although it is not listed within the official soundtrack.
3572125 Paul Blart Mall Cop stickers don't grow on trees!!!1! So Jeff will have to chip in to help us out since we can only afford 2 and a half (if my mum remebers to give me my pocket money xDDDD) so he will have to buy the other 3572122.5 stickers. Each sticker is £10.38 so the total wi
Fun Fact: In January 2009, Sony expressed an interest in making a sequel to Paul Blart: Mall Cop. It was revealed on January 7, 2014 that Andy Fickman was in talks to direct the film while James Kevin, who also co-wrote the script with Nick Bakay, would be back to star as Blart. James produced the film along with Todd Garner and Happy Madison's Adam Sandler. The cast includes David Henrie, Raini Rodriguez <3,Eduardo Verástegui, Nicholas Turturro, Gary Valentine, Neal McDonough, Daniella Alonso, and D. B. Woodside, starring alongside James.
On March 14, 2014, the Nevada Film Office announced that Sony Pictures had been awarded the first certificate of eligibility for a new tax credit enacted in 2013, in regard to the filming of Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2. Nevada Film Office Director, Eric Preiss, indicated that the production would get $4.3 million in tax credits based on the proposal in their application. On April 2, 2014, Columbia Pictures announced that the film would be released on April 17, 2015.
ll become £37078625.74AKA for you yankee twats $47204753.41. That is lots. lots is That is £37 million. It may sound like a lot but that is just 5.8% of his daily salary.
Fun Fact:In an October 2012 interview, James said that he liked the idea of filming the sequel at the Mall of America. Principal photography commenced on April 21, 2014, at Wynn Las Vegas, and ended on June 26, 2014. It is the first time that Steve Wynn has allowed a commercial film to be shot at this property.
Now that all the boring stuff is out of the way we can conclude with A FINAL persuasive paragraph. What has been the purpose of man? Our sole purpose of survival? Nay I tell you! It is that of we which laugh at, that makes us man and unites us under the perplexing banner of Paul Blart Mall Cop.
P.S This is funny so actually do it or else