Ok and so on and off for 7 years I’ve been with a man that had cheated lied deceived over and over. A man that has sat back and watched me struggle on my own time and time again. A man that couldn’t even get up to help around the house because he stated that being a stay a home dad was tiring and hard even though he just sat around on his PlayStation while the kids are left to do as they please until I got home then mommy to the rescue. He’s done things unspeakable, I won’t even mention, and each time I’ve gathered up enough strength to leave he begs to keep our children with him, then proceeds to use them against me, disappears, blocks, ignores me when it comes to me seeing, talking, or communicating our children’s needs. Each time he’s told a story to everyone that portrays me as a villain and now my Children are old enough to talk and on the rarities that I have gotten to see them since leaving they tell me things like dad said you’re left us because you don’t want to take care of us, dad says you don’t want to be a family, dad says you don’t love us because your left and not coming back. I’ve confronted him many times on the comments of our almost 3 year old and 5 year old. He denies it. He has called me to harass me about being in a relationship with him, calls to harass me on how much he’s hurt by me leaving. Promises every promise he’s promised in the past. Yet still does not allow me to talk to my children. In our years together I have been mentally, emotionally abused, and even physically before. And each time I get away and leave to be better for myself, and force him to grow up and be a man for himself and our children. I have to go back down the same road. This time I even left him my apartment, applied for rental assistance and utility assistance to help him until he could get a job. Still His family talks negatively about me every time I leave him, he spreads rumors, and now he’s telling our children things about me that are the furthest from the truth. As he has in the past but always denies it. And Sadly I have to admit I have Always fold under the pressure and give back into his manipulation and persuasion about being how he loves me and will change , About bring a family and being there for my children, not wanting them to grow up in a broken home. So I’ve fallen back into the vicious cycle over and over again for nearly 7 years almost. I have finally for the first time since I’ve met him been able to say I Will be ok without him. And I Will no longer believe that I have to live in a toxic relationship or situation in order to be a good mother. And All I want in life is to be a good mother to my children, too take care of them and be there for them. To shower thenm with love every possible chance I get. But I see more now then ever before that as long as I am not with HIM, he will forever use my children as ammunition to hurt me. My mother, their grandmother she used to visit them multiple times a week sometimes and even started babysitting for him after I left so he could get a job. She was almost the only means of communication I had with my children because he stopped responding stop texting back blocked me on social media. And now according to my mom she hasn’t even been able to see them since about two weeks ago, which was around the same time he called me going crazy, said he was having a mental break down because I wasn’t there with him, and that he couldn’t do this. He talked About how what I do with MY life affects him, and how hurt he is that I left. Questioning my whereabouts and whom I’m with. Yelling at the children in the background to shut up and go sit the fuck down. Because he was too busy yelling and screaming uncontrollably over the phone at me for outlandish reasons that had nothing to do with our children. I had to hang up. Then proceeded to text me this crazy apology about how it’s his head and so much other craziness, and when I politely offered to take our kings for a while and give him a break he stated that I could not have “HIS” children. And that is the last time I heard from him. I’ve texted him almost every day with no reply even texting from another number and nothing. I used to talk to my kids through video chat with my mom when s as he baby sat and I can’t even do that anymore. I just want to talk to my children when I’m not able to be there physically and be able to see them and have them with me and spend time with them when I get time off from work and can be there physically. That’s all I want. Nd now I have no other choice but to go through the courts. Just to be able to get open and free visitation and communication with our children since he has done nothing but deny me that.  I need some help though. I need some support. For those of you who really know me and have been a shoulder to cry on, a therapist , or just someone to talk to that knows what I’ve gone through and go through with truth, regardless of all the negatives he has tried to throw my way against me and about me. I need you guys to sign this petition and if you’d like leave a positive short comment about me, and the importance of being a part of my children lives. I don’t want any false statements or lies just truthful testimony to help me during the court process so that I can see my babies and be there for them. That’s all I want.