"The other day, I Googled "water." It was the last time I drank Orange Gatorade. I found out that this "water" is a controversial flame retardant chemical that is in all Gatorade drinks! Who wants to drink that? Not me!
I’m naturally a curious and argumentative person doing things like getting stoned and talking to republicans. I also love sports like halo 2, and I always believed Gatorade when they said stuff in their ads about how it's good to drink when I'm thirsty from a night of raiding dungeons. And, just like most people, I care about my health. So, as I was sitting at home the other day, toking up and drinking an Orange Gatorade, I decided to look up some of the ingredients.
The first ingredient is "water". No one has banned it yet, but it's clearly pretty dangerous stuff. Thousands of people die every year when this toxic chemical interferes with proper lung function. Hundreds of people are admitted to hospitals with severe burns from water vapor ever year. It's also what chemtrails are made of, and we know how evil those are! Clearly, this is a very dangerous chemical.
According to Wikipedia, water is widely used as a flame retardant and is found in some beverages including some flavors of Gatorade. It is also under intense scrutiny because research has shown that water builds up in people's bodies, including breast milk, and in the brain. This is pretty serious!
I am not a scientist, but I am currently sitting in an armchair; if there are lots of suspicious things about putting a flame retardant chemical in Gatorade, then why would Gatorade want to put it in a product designed for people like me who are into sports and health?
It doesn't make sense. Please sign my petition asking Gatorade to stop putting flame retardant chemicals in sports drinks.