Avocados should come with safety warning!

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Across the country everyday people slice their hands open trying to get into these deliciously creamy, yet deadly snacks. It's criminal and simply must be stopped.

Prevalence of this issue: Widespread and increasing in middle-class kitchens.

Symptoms: Blood spurting everywhere. Shouting: “Ow! My hand!” Chronic embarrassment. Avocado ruined.

The British Association of Plastic, Reconstructive and Aesthetic Surgeons wants safety-warning labels placed on avocados and he's quite right. “There is minimal understanding of how to handle them,” the honorary secretary of Bapras, Simon Eccles, told the Times.