No Italics, No Bold, No Future

No Italics, No Bold, No Future
Dearest Facebook,
I think I'm speaking for basically everyone when I say that I'm SO glad you haven't yet implemented italics on your FABULOUS social networking site yet. It's perfect for when I'm trying to EMPHASIZE a word, or mention the TITLE of a film, or just generally be a SARCASTIC JERK. I LOVE the ambiguity it conveys to people who are wondering whether I'm actually trying to articulate something or just RANDOMLY SHOUTING WORDS. Also, who even needs a BOLD FONT OPTION? Not me, that's for SURE.
Joking aside though, I think It's great that we now have more options than ever to express ourselves on FB: Like instead of just "Liking" a post we can now express "Love", "Haha", "Wow", "Sad" and even "Angry"; what a time to be alive! But at the same time, what if my reaction is quizzical? Could we maybe think about adding a "Quizzical" button? - I imagine it as a little face with a few question marks around its head, and he's like, "Huh?" - He kind of looks confused like, "What the hell?" or, "I'm not sure I really understand what's going on here" (I've got some rough sketches if you need me to send them on). Similarly what if I'm a mixture of "Sad" and "Haha"? Like how I feel after watching FOREST GUMP. Could we maybe get a button for that? (I'll leave the design on that one up to you guys; I've got a feeling you're going to nail it). And obviously the elephant in the room is still the lack of a "Dislike" button; it's not that I'd even USE it, I LOVE everything on Facebook, but I think we can all agree that it'd be nice to have the option; I mean, this isn't Nazi Germany; you've got to TRUST us.
And this is the last thing but just because I'm on a roll here; I was thinking that maybe we could get an option to "Like" people's "Likes"? Like what if a friend "Likes" my funny link and I want to show my appreciation by "Liking" his "Like"? Am I just supposed to send him a PM saying "thanks" or what?
And this is ACTUALLY the last thing but could we also maybe think about getting customizable notification sounds for Facebook chat? Like when I get a new message from a certain friend I want it to sound like a cash register opening. Like the sound that $$$ makes. And for another friend I want it to sound like horse neighing. Because they remind me of a horse. Because they have long eyelashes and love carrots.
***AND THIS IS ACTUALLY THE LAST THING FOR REAL THIS TIME!!!!*** - I was just thinking that maybe we could have a commemorative profile pic option for Nicholas Cages' 36th year on screen? Like the French flag overlay one except instead of a French flag its a picture of Nick Cage? I think it could be a BIG hit.
Anyway, thanks for your time guys; you're the real heroes. I feel like if we all pull together we can have this up and running by January 2k19, and like Nikos Kazantzakis always said; "In order to succeed , we must first believe we can." :P
SINCERELY,
Basically Everyone xoxo ha ;)
P.S. Very last thing - maybe we could get a few David Beckham sticker packs? I just think that they might come in handy.
P.P.S Please find a copy of my CV attached.