Make Mykenzie a Manager
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It's long overdue. Mykenzie Rogers needs to become a manager. With employees coming and leaving Sonic everyday, only Mykenzie has been there through it all. With 5 whole months of experience at the Grapevine location, there is nary a more suitable candidate than Mykenzie.
Mykenzie is ready to take on the challenge! Mykenzie thrives on taking on new responsibilities. Having been asked if he would rise to the task, this quote from Mykenzie clearly illustrates his enthusiasm for the upcoming opportunity.
"Sure" - Mykenzie Rogers (2018)
Mykenzie has made many promises that he intends to fulfill if this landmark achievement comes to pass. His platform consists of the following:
- Mykenzie promises to reinstate the infamous hall pass policy. "It may seem to be a hassle" claims Mykenzie, "...but it is the only surefire way to keep people accountable for their disappearances during work hours." This hall pass policy is probably the least popular of his promised changes, but he promises to buffer it with some "really groovy benefits man." - Mykenzie Rogers
- Mykenzie is insistent that once he gets elected he will get rid of having to do slush bottles. "Never again shall we become slaves to those patronizing plastic partitioning pieces", states the soon-to-be manager. "Every day its the same thing. We have to clean the bottles just so that they can get dirty again the next day and we can repeat the process. When I become manager this too will pass." - Mykenzie Rogers
- Mykenzie realizes the potential that the Sonic brand has and plans to expand the franchise into the mainstream industry. "With the increasing threat of an all-out nuclear war becoming more and more imminent", he warns, "all precautions that are necessary to the preservation of our beautiful, successful, and very profitable free market formula must be protected." Now this is all very good talk but does Mykenzie even have a clue what to do? Well, actually he does. "I have already begun negotiations with breeding centers in certain regions of Canada. While details of the trade must be kept to the professionals, what I can tell you is that a trade between our World-Famous Sonic Maple Syrup and the Canadian Beaver has been arranged. Current patent pending technology has been uncovered that can extract the body mass essence from one organism and, for lack of a better term, morph it into another. In layman's terms, if you had enough beavers, you could turn them into a beaver human hybrid. Now I'm not saying we're planning to make a giant mutant beaver army, but we're planning on making a giant mutant beaver army." - Mykenzie
Clearly, Mykenzie has put much thought into the responsibility, practicality, and delicate nature of the role of Sonic Drive-In Manager. But he cannot make this happen alone. Only with the approval of his peers, both in and out of the workplace, can we make this utopia a reality. There are many who would seek to keep Mykenzie in the lowly and dull carhop position. These nay-sayers would do anything to keep the blessing of Mykenzie's management from reaching the light of day. But we know that with your help we can do the right thing. One day, the strength of man will fail. But today is not that day. Do the Right Thing, Make Mykenzie your King. Sign the petition today. Make a Difference.
This message was not sponsored, paid for, or asked for by the ManagerMykenzie foundation.
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