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Deflate rising costs of erectile dysfunction pills and make sex better for older Americans

This petition had 69 supporters

Licensed prostitutes at my world famous Bunny Ranch brothel are getting a mouthful from their elderly customers about the rapidly elevating prices of drugs like Viagra, Cialis, & other sexual performance enhancers, prompting them to take action to get the federal government to come to their aid.  

 The 540 independent contractors who comprise my workforce have launched an online petition, asking the federal government to implement price controls on the drugs that have seen their costs increase 500%.  The rising prices of the pills are actually affecting our clients’ discretionary budgets, and its effects are starting to trickle down onto the prostitutes themselves.  Prescription drug price controls are something that liberal politicians have long been in favor of, and Nevada’s sex workers are ready to join the call for action – and, frankly, so am I.

 This is a drug that is necessary to a lot of older Americans, and when big pharmaceutical companies are allowed to run amuck unregulated, it’s always the ones most in need who pay the price.  I’m tired of the unreasonably high costs of these medications, and I want my government to do something about it.  I’m proud that my girls at all seven brothels that I own are leading the charge.

 I have worked hard my entire life to become financially successful, and as a result, I have the means to provide for myself and any needs that I may have.  I empathize with the challenges of aging, and the fact that not everyone is in the fiscally comfortable position that I’m in means that it’s going to be a lot harder on some than it will be on others.

 My sex workers are asking all their clients to sign the online petition, and to use social media to spread their word.  One of our courtesans put it best when she said, “Our elderly patrons have earned the right to ask us to exercise understanding when it comes to their medical needs, and we’re standing firm for them.” 

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