Daughter-in-law must have equal legal rights if she is a widow

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Anita Kanitz
2 years ago
"Freedom cannot be achieved unless the women have been emancipated from all forms of oppression."- Nelson Mandela

"Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim."
-| Nora Ephron

Books about hate crimes against females:

"Child Marriage, My Story: I was raped, forced into marriage at 9, a mother by 10" by Dr. Majid Rafizadeh :
Dr. Majid Rafizadeh, a political scientist, human rights defender, and journalist, is president of the International American Council on the Middle East. Harvard-educated, Rafizadeh serves on the board of Harvard International Review published by Harvard International Relations Council at Harvard University. He is frequently called upon to brief US, EU, and Asian officials, and parliaments about US foreign policy and Middle Eastern affairs. Rafizadeh regularly appears, and is quoted, on national and international outlets, including CNN, BBC TV and radio, France 24, ABC, and NBC. Dr. Rafizadeh's writings and analyses regularly appear on academic and non-academic outlets, including The New York Times, Los Angeles Times, CNN, Foreign Policy, Yale Journal of International Affairs, The Atlantic, Newsweek, The Daily Beast, Al Jazeera, Al Arabiya English, and Bloomberg News. A recent US citizen, Rafizadeh grew up in Iran and Syria. He said: “My experience with oppression motivated me to use my pen and skills as tools to further the principles of democracy, social justice, and gender equality. Living in both of these countries also allowed me to gain deep insights into the repressive apparatuses used not only to stifle the innovation, creativity, and potential of the youth but also to crush any form of free speech, press, rule of law, equality for women, and religion.”

"Child Brides, Global Consequences: How to End Child Marriage" by Gayle Tzemach Lemmon (Author), Lynn S. ElHarake (Author) :
One-third of the world's girls are married before the age of eighteen, limiting both their educational and economic potential. Child marriage is damaging to global prosperity and stability, yet despite the urgency of the issue, there remains a significant lack of data on the subject. Senior Fellow Gayle Tzemach Lemmon discusses both the factors that contribute to and strategies that have proved effective against child marriage.

"No Way Out: Child Marriage and Human Rights Abuses in Tanzania" by Human Rights Watch :
This 75-page report documents how child marriage severely curtails girls’ access to education, and exposes them to exploitation and violence – including marital rape and female genital mutilation (FGM) – and reproductive health risks. Human Rights Watch examined the gaps in Tanzania’s child protection system, the lack of protection for victims of child marriage, and the obstacles girls face in attempting to obtain redress, as well as shortcomings in existing laws and government plans to combat child marriage.

"Woman at Point Zero" by Nawal El Saadawi (Author), Miriam Cooke (Foreword), Sherif Hetata (Translator) :
'An unforgettable, unmissable book for the new global feminist.'
The Times

'All the men I did get to know filled me with but one desire: to lift my hand and bring it smashing down on his face.'

So begins Firdaus's remarkable story of rebellion against a society founded on lies, hypocrisy, brutality and oppression. Born to a peasant family in the Egyptian countryside, Firdaus struggles through childhood, seeking compassion and knowledge in a world which gives her little of either. As she grows up and escapes the fetters of her childhood, each new relationship teaches her a bitter but liberating truth – that the only free people are those who want nothing, fear nothing and hope for nothing.

This classic novel has been an inspiration to countless people across the world. Saadawi's searing indictment of society's brutal treatment of women continues to resonate today.

Asking for It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture--and What We Can Do about It by Kate Harding:
In the era of #metoo, a clear-eyed, sharp look at rape culture, sexual assault, harassment and violence against women--and what we can do about it.
"A timely and brilliant book." (Jessica Valenti)

Stalkers and their Victims by Paul E. Mullen:
Stalking has moved from being a novel area for study to become a core area of concern for mental health professionals, lawyers and other members of the criminal justice system. It has emerged as a significant social problem which not only commands considerable public attention but is now, in many jurisdictions, a specific form of criminal offence. This new edition brings the reader completely up-to-date with the explosion in published research and clinical studies in the field, and covers new issues such as cyberstalking, stalking health professionals, stalking in the workplace, female stalkers, juvenile stalkers, stalking celebrities, evaluating risk in the stalking situation, as well as exploring changes to the legal status of the behaviour. Illustrated with case studies throughout, this is the definitive guide and reference for anyone with professional, academic or other interests in this complex behaviour.

Cut: One Woman's Fight Against FGM in Britain Today by Hibo Wardere:
Imagine for a moment that you are 6-years-old and you are woken in the early hours, bathed and then dressed in rags before being led down to an ominous looking tent at the end of your garden. And there, you are subjected to the cruellest cut, ordered by your own mother. Forced down on a bed, her legs held apart, Hibo Warderewas made to undergo female genital cutting, a process so brutal, she nearly died. As a teenager she moved to London in the shadow of the Somalian Civil War where she quickly learnt the procedure she had undergone in her home country was not 'normal' in the west. She embarked on a journey to understand FGM and its roots, whilst raising her own family and dealing with the devastating consequences of the cutting in her own life. Today Hibo finds herself working in London as an FGM campaigner, helping young girls whose families plan to take them abroad for the procedure. She has vowed to devote herself to the campaign against FGM. Eloquent and searingly honest, this is Hibo's memoir which promises not only to tell her remarkable story but also to shed light on a medieval practice that's being carried out in the 21st century, right on our doorstep. FGM in the UK has gone undocumented for too long and now that's going to change. Devastating, empowering and informative, this book brings to life a clash of cultures at the heart of contemporary society and shows how female genital mutilation is a very British problem.--

No Visible Bruises: What We Don't Know about Domestic Violence Can Kill Us by Rachel Louise Snyder:
A seminal and breathtaking account of why home is the most dangerous place to be a woman . . . A tour de force.Eve Ensler
"Terrifying, courageous reportage from our internal war zone." Andrew Solomon
"Extraordinary." New York Times ,Editors Choice

Sex Trafficking by Siddharth Kara:
Every year, hundreds of thousands of women and children are abducted, deceived, seduced, or sold into forced prostitution, coerced to service hundreds if not thousands of men before being discarded. These trafficked sex slaves form the backbone of one of the world's most profitable illicit enterprises and generate huge profits for their exploiters, for unlike narcotics, which must be grown, harvested, refined, and packaged, sex slaves require no such "processing," and can be repeatedly "consumed."

Kara first encountered the horrors of slavery in a Bosnian refugee camp in 1995. Subsequently, in the first journey of its kind, he traveled across four continents to investigate these crimes and take stock of their devastating human toll. Kara made several trips to India, Nepal, Burma, Thailand, Laos, Vietnam, the United Kingdom, Italy, the Netherlands, Denmark, Albania, Moldova, Mexico, and the United States. He witnessed firsthand the sale of human beings into slavery, interviewed over four hundred slaves, and confronted some of those who trafficked and exploited them.

Sold To Be A Wife: Only a determined foster carer can stop a terrified girl from becoming a child bride (A Maggie Hartley Foster Carer Story) by Maggie Hartley:
Maggie Hartley has fostered more than 300 children while being a foster carer for over twenty years. Taking on the children other carers often can't cope with, Maggie helps children that are deemed 'unadoptable' because of their behaviour or the extreme trauma that they've been through. She's looked after refugees, supported children through sexual abuse and violence court cases, cared for teenagers on remand and taught young mums how to parent their newborn babies.

The Child Bride by Cathy Glass:
Cathy Glass, international bestselling author, tells the shocking story of Zeena, a young Asian girl desperate to escape from her family.

Beautiful: A beautiful girl. An evil man. One inspiring true story of courage by Katie Piper:
Born in Hampshire in 1983, Katie Piper refuses to let anything stand in her way. Since being the victim of an acid attack she has been more courageous than ever. Her Cutting Edge documentary Katie: My Beautiful Face won her a BAFTA nomination and was shown in 15 different countries around the world. In December 2009, she was selected to present Channel 4's Alternative Christmas Message. In Spring 2011, Katie also appeared in her Channel 4 show Katie: My Beautiful Friends.

Against Our Will: Men, Women, and Rape by Susan Brownmiller:
The bestselling feminist classic that revolutionized the way we think about rape, as a historical phenomenon and as an urgent crisis—essential reading in the era of #MeToo.

“A major work of history.”—The Village Voice • One of the New York Public Library’s 100 Books of the Century

Fraternity Gang Rape: Sex, Brotherhood, and Privilege on Campus by Peggy Reeves Sanday :
This widely acclaimed and meticulously documented volume illustrates, in painstaking and disturbing detail, the nature of fraternity gang rape. Drawing on interviews with both victims and fraternity members, Peggy Reeves Sanday reconstructs daily life in the fraternity, highlighting the role played by pornography, male bonding, and degrading, often grotesque, initiation and hazing rituals.

In a substantial new introduction and afterword, Sanday updates the incidences of fraternity gang rape on college campuses today, highlighting such recent cases as that of Duke University and others in the headlines. Sanday also explores the nature of hazing at sororities on campus and how Greek life in general contributes to a culture which promotes the exploitation and sexual degradation of women on campus. More broadly, Sanday examines the nature of campus life today and the possibility of creating a rape-free campus culture.

Epidemic: America's Trade in Child Rape by Lori Handrahan:
The problem of child sex abuse and its cover-up is real. A generation of American children are being destroyed. If you think this happens to someone else's children and your children are safe, you are mistaken. Your children might be enduring sexual abuse right now while you remain dangerously ignorant. America's appetite for child pornography puts all our children at risk. Your children and mine. Whether you acknowledge it or not. This book is a wake-up call about a subject too few people want to discuss. That is, while no one was watching, America has become a child pornography nation.

The Psychology of Lust Murder: Paraphilia, Sexual Killing, and Serial Homicide by Catherine Purcell and Bruce A. Arrigo:
The Psychology of Lust Murder systematically examines the phenomenon of paraphilia (i.e., aberrant sexuality) in relationship to the crime of lust murder. By synthesizing the relevant theories on sexual homicide and serial killing, the authors develop an original, timely, sensible model that accounts for the emergence and progression of paraphilias expressed through increasingly violent erotic fantasies. Over time, these disturbing paraphilic images that, among other things, involve rape, body mutilation and dismemberment, torture, post-mortem sexual intercourse, and cannibalism, are all actualized. Thus, it is the sustained presence of deviant sexuality that contributes to and serves as underlying motive for the phenomenon of lust murder (a.k.a. erotophonophilia). Going well beyond theoretical speculation, the authors (Dr. Catherine Purcell, a forensic psychologist and Dr. Bruce Arrigo, a criminologist) apply their integrated model to the gruesome and chilling case of Jeffrey Dahmer.

The Stoning of Soraya M.: A Story of Injustice in Iran by Freidoune Sahebjam:
Soraya M.’s husband, Ghorban-Ali, couldn’t afford to marry another woman. Rather than returning Soraya’s dowry, as custom required before taking a second wife, he plotted with four friends and a counterfeit mullah to dispose of her. Together, they accused Soraya of adultery. Her only crime was cooking for a friend’s widowed husband. Exhausted by a lifetime of abuse and hardship, Soraya said nothing, and the makeshift tribunal took her silence as a confession of guilt. They sentenced her to death by stoning: a punishment prohibited by Islam but widely practiced.

Day by day—sometimes minute by minute—Sahebjam deftly recounts these horrendous events, tracing Soraya’s life with searing immediacy, from her arranged marriage and the births of her children to her husband’s increasing cruelty and her horrifying execution, where, by tradition, her father, husband, and sons hurled the first stones. A stark look at the intersection between culture and justice, this is one woman’s story, but it stands for the stories of thousands of women who suffered—and continue to suffer—the same fate. It is a story that must be told.

Opinion: I’m not a distraction, far from it. Stop treating me as one.

Texas, 2018:
A senior at Etowah High School wrote an essay about the message school dress codes deliver to young women.

The Cherokee County student Madison Jones’ concerns over dress codes and the misplaced focus on how the behavior and appearance of girls impacts boys and their education.

Most recently, that is a Texas elementary school that included a hallway quote attributed to a woman who ran a high-priced Manhattan escort service: “The more you act like a lady, the more he’ll act like a gentleman.”

In the same week the story broke about the quote, another Texas school drew headlines for creating and showing a video on dress codes that featured only female students and used M.I.A.'s "Bad Girls” as its soundtrack. The video showcased the offense of girls wearing athletic shorts to school, zooming in on their legs to make the point.

In both cases, parents and students rose up and schools retreated, replacing the Mayflower Madam quote with one by teenage Nobel Prize winner Malala Yousafzai and apologizing for the video.

Girls have been dress coded and pulled from class for showing their collarbones or wearing tank tops that reveal shoulders.

The good news is more schools are heeding the voices of young women like Madison Jones and adopting dress codes that affirm all students should be able to dress comfortably for school without fear of or actual unnecessary discipline or body shaming and that staff and students both should understand they’re responsible for managing their own personal "distractions" without regulating individual students' clothing/self-expression.

With that, here is the piece by Madison:

By Madison Jones

I hate being a girl.

I hate being treated like a little hard work will break me. I hate being told I can’t do something because it’s for boys. I hate feeling like I’m less than, just because I’m female.

There are many things that I can’t change, unfortunately.

I can’t change the boys who catcall as they drive by in their cars. I can’t change how some people see me as “property” that needs to be “protected.” I can’t change that some of my anatomy is more prominent in some areas than others. I can’t change some people’s attitude.

But there are some things that I can do.

I have a voice and I know how to speak with it. I have a brain and I know how to think with it. And I have a heart, a heart I know how to listen to. And now it’s your turn.

I’m tired of being told to cover my shoulders. I’m sick of being singled out because of what I wear. I can’t stand being called out, shamed for my body, and taught to change myself for someone else.

I’m not a distraction, far from it. I’m a girl, a girl who gets up every morning, goes to school, works her tail off, goes home to work even more, and then goes to bed, sometimes at ungodly hours of the morning, over and over again so that someday I can put on that cap and gown and receive that little slip of paper that portends my future and be prepared for the next step in supporting myself and making a life.

But how am I supposed to do that when I’m not allowed in class?

What’s distracting is being singled out, called to the front of the class and publicly humiliated because my shoulders are showing, or my shorts, measured against an index card, fall short.

Why am I punished for sitting silently and doing my work? Why should I be blamed for someone else’s inability to do their job? Why do you treat me like a rape victim, being told that I asked for it, that it’s what I deserved, that I should be ashamed for who I am?

Why don’t you start teaching our boys to be respectful, instead of blaming the girl for being a “distraction”?

This is what perpetuates rape culture and mistreatment of women. You play the blame game and place these ideas in young girls’ minds that they should give in to the ideas of men and give themselves, their minds, and their hearts up.

I could understand being labeled a “distraction” if I were to come in to class in my underwear, or stand up on my desk and scream, but I’m don’t. The reason I’m a “distraction” is because I’m female.

I hope that I have not offended, or come off as rude, but I can no longer stand by and be treated like nothing. I am a girl, and I deserve respect not labels.

I thank you for taking your time to read this and I hope you will reconsider these outdated standards and help take the first step to curing our tainted society and views.

Thanks for adding your voice.

PES Jyothisha
2 years ago
Emotional compensation can't be fullfilled once they become widow...Atleast they will be free from Financial presure...

Thanks for adding your voice.

kiran kumar
2 years ago
I know the background and there should be equal rights