Outnumbered 4 to 2, with all of the odds against them, Ian Bettin and Allen Wright methodically sliced up the notoriously stingy Einstein defense on a counter strike. With God tier precision, Ian placed the perfect cross at Allen’s feet, who then fooled two defenders with footwork only rivaled by Lionel Messi, and shot a cannon blast through the back of the net. People from all around the world could feel the effects of the crowd going crazy as Allen took a victory lap around the field. Play was paused for approximately 5 minutes as Einstein players and supporters retaped their ankles and finished wiping their eyes. The fire department was called to dislodge the soccer ball from the fence behind the goal and a new goal had to be set up because of the massive hole the shot had left in the original one. Millions of people are asking for April 26th, the day Allen was born, to be a holiday with no school or work for everyone in the state of Alabama. We are also asking for the hallway named after Albert Einstein, a man who hasn’t been relevant in almost a century, to be renamed in the name of the father of the Einstein Soccer Team, Allen Wright.