Stop the memorabilia being taken from my son Ravis grave by Thetford Town Council
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Thetford Town Cemetery Committee are asking all residents to remove memorabilia from gravesites in order to facilitate
“a corporate well run and well maintained cemetery”
I lost my son Ravi to SIDS, Cot Death in 2005.
At first I couldn’t even touch a stone on the grave or stand on it .
I wanted his resting place to be a reflection of a child that was loved and is missed so much .
My son was mixed race Portuguese and his grandparents paid for a very expensive and tasteful concrete vase to go on his grave . They live in Portugal and can only visit a couple of times a year .
Not only am I disabled , but as a result of losing my precious son , I now have PTSD which has been exasperated by finding a letter on my sons grave , that I found on his anniversary of his death , a week before Mother’s Day, telling us that the graves were to be removed apart from the headstone and a vase. I have spent thousands of pounds making sure Ravis grave is tidy and tasteful . There are graves either side but Ravis is tidy .
Why after 13 years have the Council decided that the graves need to be changed. They give the reason of grass cutters having to move things , taking longer to do their jobs . Well that’s not the case with my sons grave . It’s tasteful even when left when I’m unable to get there , there’s only a few weeds and grass that took 10 mins to tidy up .
The thought of having to remove his grave , that’s been cared for and lots of money spent on it is too much for me to comprehend.
I’m so upset and to go to the Council meeting to be told they can do as they please and to email and complain , regardless of the fact others hadalready done that and their questions weren’t answered .
I went to the council meeting and spoke up about it and they didn’t show one ounce of compassion for the people who went to show they aren’t happy about their loved ones graves . Some don’t live in town anymore and so when they visit next , they may find just the headstone and nothing else but mud in front of it.
Although we all paid the council to lease the plot for 100 years or whatever it is , we apparently aren’t entitled to disagree .
Why aren’t people given a warning if the graves are left unkempt? We acknowledge not all graves are looked after as there may not be anyone to look after it now , due to death , Disability or those that moved away .
I feel truly devastated that after 13 years I’m expected to destroy something so precious to me .
If you see it there’s no way it could be deemed to be untidy or offensive to anybody. In fact I think it encouraged others to make their gravesite tidier.
I will not let this matter go . It’s far too important to me and has honestly left me feeling so low and wondering how am I going to be put with my son when I die ?
To lose a child when they are healthy and happy is something I’d not wish on my enemies.
Ive done nothing wrong and for a Council that are meant to be be there to represent us to let us down so spectacularly is utterly shocking !
There’s also employed staff at the cemetery. My sons grave does not make it difficult to strim around and as it’s been done properly, weeds can hardly get through the stones I’ve been topping up for years to keep it looking tidy and nice .
I refuse to destroy my sons resting place . I’d rather be with him there .
Mother of Ravi Ferro
Most of the residents with loved ones interred , lovingly tend to their graves and we are asking the committee to meet and develop plan that includes the residents well being
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