A Call to Carly Rae Jepsen: Please Release Disco Sweat

A Call to Carly Rae Jepsen: Please Release Disco Sweat

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Trey Voss started this petition to Carly Rae Jepsen and

If you’re asking yourself why this petition has been created when we could be curing socks with sandals or songs by Tiffany Trump, then please take a well deserved seat.

Carly Rae Jepsen is an international treasure who recently stated that she recorded an album called Disco Sweat. She claims to have buried the album in her backyard, but digging is hard work and annoying - much like this revelation - so that can’t be true. This album is more valuable than being dissed by Mariah Carey or having a phone chucked at your dome by Naomi Campbell. CRJ is obviously bating us by mentioning the album and we need her to understand that this is a human rights issue listed in an “other” category on change.org.

If Ariana can release a banger every five minutes and Miley can wear a vagina dentata catsuit we shouldn’t expect any less of Carly. Do you want to live in a world without Angelyne blasting this album down whatever roads she’s gracing? No. Is Lindsay Lohan grasping at straws with her now defunct beach house? No. Is there a reality where Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello are actually dating? No. The point is, we deserve all of these realities minus the latter and will stan CRJ until that expression has stanned itself out of existence.

It’s up to all of us to make Disco Sweat a reality and not just a Page Six headline. Don’t let your grandmothers clutch their pearls in distress; sign this petition.

Warmest regards,

Trey

 

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