Stop alienating children & loving fathers,& stop sexism against fathers
In Scotland,throughout Britain,& in countries all over the world,children are distanced,alienated,& often stopped all together,from contact with loving fathers.
A new report has claimed that fathers across Scotland are being denied access to their children due to a culture of 'institutionalised sexism' within child protection agencies. The study by Circle Scotland says men are increasingly left on the sidelines after the breakup of a family and often don't see their sons and daughters for months at a time. It goes as far as to suggest retraining of social workers so dads are viewed with the same importance and mums.
Findings from the ABS Personal Safety Survey (2005) indicated that of participants who had experienced physical abuse before the age of 15, 25.9% experienced abuse from their mother/stepmother.
A British retrospective prevalence study of 2,869 young adults aged 18-24 (May-Chahal & Cawson, 2005) found that mothers were more likely than fathers to be responsible for physical abuse (49% of incidents compared to 40%).
Social work became involved with my children after their mother admitted to,was arrested,charged,& then later convicted of assault & neglect of one of the children. I was not with the mother,& was not staying with the family at the time.
This assault & subsequent neglect,had been brought on by problems that the mother had been having for some time. Problems i had only a few months earlier contacted social work about. Telling them of my fears things were turning bad.
They did nothing.
No contact with the mother or children whatsoever.
It seemed as if a father pointing out a mothers problems or bad points wasnt valid. Or as a man,my opinions or accusations werent to be trusted.
Almost from the start of social work involvement,i was treated by them,(all women),with suspicion,& as if i was as much to blame.
I have now went from a very loving & caring father,who was very much a part of my childrens lives & spent a lot of time with them.
To an alienated father,allowed no contact with them whatsoever,through the bitterness,twistedness,manipulation of social work,& manipulation of the truth & blatant lies & unfounded allegations of women in mine & my childrens lives.
It is only fair to say. That i had social problems in my own life at this time,that gave social work some concern. But none so much that i & my children deserved to be torn apart & have no more contact.
No one within the social work & child protection services seems to understand,care about,or realise the damage parental,& even grandparential alienation,can cause to young minds.
I know first hand,the damage & long term ill effects,right through to adulthood, parental & grandparental alienation can cause,first hand. Through my own childhood experiences. The low sense of self worth. Bad relationship & friendship choices. Low confidence. Depression. All can & are caused by this.
It is my experience,& many other fathers agree,social work & child protection services are routinely sexist & suspicious of fathers. & from day one with them fathers have to constantly defend & prove themselves,over & over. No matter what hoops they have you jump through,theres always another. & you are never fully trusted.
They just cant seem to accept that a father wants to be in a childs life because he loves them,wants to protect & guide them,& wants the best for them. You always seem to be viewed as having an ulterior motive.
The secret closed non public child protection panels & courts where these important decisions are made need to change,(e.g. Whether a 6yr old girl,& 10yr old boy,should have no more contact whatsoever with a father who loves them more than life itself & has been a huge part of their whole life. On the say so of a sexist,biased,& manipulated social work system). Be more transparent. & have some sort of appeal process. Panels where social works opinion & rumours & unfounded allegations & regurgitation of lies as fact are taken above all else.
This needs to change. Social work & their sexist attitudes need to change.
Child protection services grasp of truth & lies,& whole heartedly believing a sexist & incompetent social work system,need to change.
If you think this is wrong & unfair.
If you think a child deserves the love,time,& attention,of a parent. & the security & sense of self worth this brings to a child.
If your father made a positive difference,in any way,to your life.
If you know of any child whose father isnt interested in them.& wish they were.
If you are a father yourself.& cant imagine the pain of never seeing your children again. Or possibly until their adults.
Or if your an absent father,& wish you werent.
Then please sign my petition now. & forward it to a friend.
& maybe we can call for the retraining of childrens social workers. & more transparency & honesty in child protection agency decisions,panels,courts,etc..
Stuart. Proud but alienated father of 2.
At the time of creating this petition,i am unsure as to where or whom i should present the completed petition. But rest assured those of you who choose to sign. I will find the relevent person or persons to present it to for a chance at change. Anyone signing,please feel free to leave suggestion as to whom this petition would be best served upon. Thanks