Okay I'm gonna write this in the next 60 seconds so I don't spend 20 minutes on something dumb.

I used to be a very loved rogue that had all of the shineys. I loved my shineys.
Sadly, one night after being loved by the people, an old hag went up to me and cursed me!
"Ye shall be an obese chicken until thy find true purpose!"
I don't know for how long I was a chicken... some said that it was just a phase and I'd get over it, but I knew I had to find true purpose.
And I did.
My true purpose is shineys.
The curse lifted and I returned to a rogue, but all of my shineys didn't shine as they used to. They had become old. I needed new shineys.
Since then I've been trying to get shineys with a group of lovely people, but the shineys never come.

Please help me get shineys. I am desperate.