Mr. Kejriwal, Please change your lawyer!

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In a recent example of tyranny by the Central Government, Mr. Arvind Kejriwal (The Honorable Chief Minister of Delhi) is being sued by Mr. Arun Jaitley (The Finance Minister of India) over Mr. Kejriwal's allegations of alleged corruption in DDCA. If Mr. Jaitley wins this case, it might start copycat lawsuits from other people. As the Finance Minister Mr. Jaitley knows very well that the total money in circulation in the country is not sufficient to meet the demand if Mr. Kejriwal is forced to pay compensation against every false allegation he has made. Clearly Mr. Jaitley is trying to sabotage the country's economy, which is his agenda anyway.

To make the matters worse, Mr. Kejriwal has retained the services of Ram Jethmalani to represent him in this case. As a lawyer, Mr. Jethmalani has failed in defending more people from death than Delhi's all Dengue hospitals combined. Even people like Harshad Mehta, accused of financial crime, ended up dead when represented by Jethmalani.

All this happens, while Mr. Somnath Bharti, one of the brightest legal minds in the country, is cooling his heels in Mr.Kejriwal's backyard. Time and again this loyal soldier of Mr. Kejriwal has proved his capabilities and yet we continue to ignore him. Here are some of his accomplishments:

  • When informed of prostitution activity in a certain area, he created new legal precedents by ordering a lady's arrest without warrant at midnight under IPC sections such as "she totally looks like a prostitute", "see, she is black" and "because I say so". He is a firm believer of transparency in judicial process. He even showed the willingness to administer the collection of a urine sample on national TV, presumably to look for evidence of prostitution from the sample.
  • When accused of setting his dog on his wife in a domestic violence case, he surrendered with the dog and proved his innocence by demonstrating his dog's lack of interest in biting Hawaldar Bir Singh. The brilliant legal argument was heard and very appreciated by a bench comprising of Hawaldar Bir Singh, Chai Wala Chhotu and cameramen from all major channels. To put things in perspective, even Salman's lawyer didn't take the risk of demonstrating his client's lack of interest in running over (more) people. And his client is an actor!
  • As the enterprising CEO of Top Sites LLC, Mr.Bharti managed to sell something he didn't own, to people who didn't need it, while beating Google's mighty spam filters. In doing so, Mr. Bharti provided substantial ForEx for the country and also for his bank account. If this doesn't make him look like a lawyer, nothing will. He also successfully explained the illegality of his operation (to Mr.Kejriwal that is) by using "I didn't know what was written in those papers I was signing" clause in the constitution.

At this crucial juncture, when the Honorable CM is working hard towards another honorable season of  his high TRP government, he is missing the services of the man he needs the most. A man who can tie Kejriwal's shoelaces really well, and wouldn't hesitate to shove anyone for his right to do so. A man, whose law degree is not  even fake!... as far as we know..... probably

Mr. Kejriwal, please change your lawyer!



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