Bring back squirty custard in a can

Bring back squirty custard in a can

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Edward Nauen started this petition to Anchor and

When I was a child, magic was real. A host of imaginary butterflies and songbirds accompanied me everywhere like tiny flappy angels. I did not know what sadness was and every day was summer in my world. This was the same for every single child in Britain.

The reason? Squirty custard in a can. This foamy yellow elixir was our passion, our joy, our life. Whether atop sliced bananas, alongside a pancake, or squirted directly from the can into my grateful gaping maw, this sweet nitrous-inflated dairy emulsion gave my life meaning and purpose in a way that mere human interaction never could.

Then a corporate monster took it all away and left a child heartbroken.

Anchor, how could you?

Are you making some kind of hideous doomsday device powered by the tears of bereft kids? Perhaps you never stopped making it and are stockpiling it for yourselves? Is it that you never tire of seeing crowds of now middle aged 1980s children outside your offices silently mouthing the word “why”?

I beseech you - rectify this injustice and make us whole again. For the sake of everybody’s children, bring back the squirty custard. Please.

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