Have Deutsch Host the Oscars

Have Deutsch Host the Oscars

0 have signed. Let’s get to 100!
At 100 signatures, this petition is more likely to be featured in recommendations!
Jeremy Newman started this petition to Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences

Michael Henry "Deutsch" Deutsch is a twenty-two year old hailing from Dunwoody, Georgia and currently residing in Auburn, Alabama. On December 15th of this year, Deutsch will graduate from Auburn University with a degree in Business Analytics. He is currently in the midst of a job search, diligently checking Indeed.com.

But already out there, ready and for the taking, is the perfect job for Deutsch. A job which Deutsch is uniquely qualified for. A job many have attempted but none have perfected. A job looking for a fresh, new face - a face attached to someone who has not sent out homophobic tweets.

That job is host of the 91st Academy Awards Ceremony.

Host of the Academy Awards was a previously prestigious gig which many actors, actresses, comedians and socialites would clamor for, but the era of Trump and #MeToo has turned the talent pool cold. No personality has yet felt up to the challenge of standing up to an ever-dwindling amount of viewers and making bad social commentary and jokes that fall flat.

That is, no personality except Deutsch.

Growing up in the Atlanta area, Deutsch has enjoyed being in a location approximately close to where a handful of movies and shows were filmed, giving him a uniquely vague perspective on the entertainment industry. Deutsch was also an active member of his college improv-troupe, where he perfected his comedic chops until he reached whatever standard of comedy is a college improv-troupe.

Deutsch is also an avid watcher of movies. A subscriber of Netflix, Hulu, Amazon TV and HBO Go, Deutsch has watched at least like five movies - and that's just these past four years. That's more than easily 95% of the people who these movies are intended for. He was also one of three people in the world who bought MoviePass, exemplifying his tepid yet above-average support for the industry.

As far as being in tune with the today's political and social climate, you need not look farther than Deutsch. Deutsch has an active Twitter feed and occasionally watches CNN, so he's just as in tune with what's happening in the world as anybody else is. Deutsch's politics fall just left of center, so his attitudes and commentary will reverberate with effectively no-one - perfect for the Academy Awards.

So please, lend your support to naming Deutsch the host of the 91st Academy Awards Ceremony, before the committee runs out of ideas and gives the job to Louis C.K. as part of his come back tour - which is totally something they would do.

Do it for Deutsch. Do it for yourself. Do it because you know you're not going to watch the Oscars either way.

0 have signed. Let’s get to 100!
At 100 signatures, this petition is more likely to be featured in recommendations!