Let Justin Desmarais Host the Oscars

Let Justin Desmarais Host the Oscars

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Justin Desmarais started this petition to Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences

The Oscars are going to air without a host?  What, do you want this to be like 1989 all over again?  We can't let this happen!  Otherwise it's just a bunch of pretty people sitting in a room, waiting for something to happen when they know in their heart nothing really will.  Kind of like a casting call I suppose.  Therefore, I hereby nominate myself, Justin Desmarais, to host the 2019 Academy Awards. 

Here is a quick rundown of my qualifications:

- I am very, very cheap

- I can write my own puns

- I look pretty good in a tux

- No homophobic tweets

- Not going to project my own views (there's the pun game at work!)

- Good in front of a crowd

- I've never taken off my shirt at a Superbowl half-time show

- My mouth make good words

- I can do the floss dance for exactly 3 seconds before screwing it up

- Willing to verify that I'm holding the right Best Picture card instead of the La La Land one for some reason.  That's going the extra mile!

- Not friends with Johnny Depp.  I don't know why, but for some reason that feels like it helps my chances.

Imagine the immediate buzz that the televised event would garner when it's announced that this (relative) unknown is hosting the biggest night in show biz!  People would tune in to witness the bold new direction the Oscars is taking.  Whether it be to watch me fall flat on my face in excruciating embarrassment (chyeah right) or to see this Average Joe soar beyond what people though possible for a televised awards ceremony (more likely), people will tune in to make this the best (read: most viewed) Oscars in at least like, 2 years. 

Let's make it happen!  Justin Desmarais to host The Oscars!

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