Broaden relationship formats, orientation, and gender choices
  • Petitioned OKCupid, a subsidiary of Match.com

This petition was delivered to:

OKCupid, a subsidiary of Match.com

Broaden relationship formats, orientation, and gender choices

    1. Anatasia Army
    2. Petition by

      Anatasia Army

      Portland, OR

Hello!

I, as well as many I know, have successfully at one time or another utilized OKCupid to make connections with likeminded people. Beyond dating, I've found a rich vein of Good People in multiple cities with whom I have had the pleasure of sharing parts of my life.

I have, through this ingenious and intuitive website, certainly opened up my horizons in terms of the diversity of people whose company I've enjoyed. I have met more trans folk, genderqueer, and non-binary individuals than I would have any other way. I am a polyamorous person, and have been for many years. OKC has proven to me it has a thriving community that runs the gamut of non-traditional relationship styles, genders, and sexes.

As fun and useful as this site is, I've found myself butting up against the meager means we have of expressing some of the most profound aspects of our lives. Currently, the options are as follows:
Gender: Male/Female
Orientation: Gay/Straight/Bi
Status: Single/Seeing Someone/Married/Available [a limited description for those who list themselves as "Seeing Someone" but still seek sex or relationships]

Now, these terms are just enough for the vast majority of people. But regardless the relative size of the subset for whom these don't apply, they are not only useful for what is likely a significant swath of OKC's users, but also might spur on some reflection in those who have, through a restrictive social hegemony, never considered that there were even other options. The use of a full socially conscious vocabulary can raise the awareness of each of these different arenas. It can create more of a safe space for intersex and trans individuals.

There are a number of ways in which this could be implemented. I'm sure I and my fellow OKC users wouldn't mind the wait for such a complex structure to be worked into a site with established coding and mountains of data stemming from a simpler system. As long as there is the recognition that there might be a better way to cater to these populations. There should ideally be a dialogue opened about what might be the most effective AND sensitive way of labeling such intricate personal information while retaining them as useful data points in the crunching of the numbers.

I look forward to a more open and interesting atmosphere on my favorite dating website!

Thanks,
Anatasia Army

Recent signatures

    News

    1. Reached 100 signatures

    Supporters

    Reasons for signing

    • Anthony Gargiulo SAN FRANCISCO, CA
      • about 3 years ago

      As someone who identifies as genderqueer, I found myself dismayed at the rather limited options presented by OKCupid's profile service. I would like to see at least one popular dating site on the Internet which shows an open awareness about the diversity and complexity of modern sexuality. I think OKCupid could be this site, it has a lot going for it, but it's not there yet.

      REPORT THIS COMMENT:
    • Marissa Speer SAN FRANCISCO, UNITED STATES MINOR OUTLYING ISLANDS
      • about 3 years ago

      Because transgender, genderqueer people exist. Because gender/sexuality is not binary.

      REPORT THIS COMMENT:
    • Andy Semler ST LOUIS, MO
      • about 3 years ago

      I keep having to change my gender from "male" to "female" to "male" etc. on a regular basis in order to compensate for this shortsightedness.

      REPORT THIS COMMENT:
    • Jasper Gunn RICHMOND, VA
      • about 3 years ago

      I have greatly enjoyed using OKCupid's service, and I plan to continue in the future. I do feel this wonderful tool somewhat compromised by the fact that I can not accurately list my gender identity OR my sexual orientation, thus limiting my ability to connect with potential partners based on such defining components of my personality.

      If you would like an example of a more inclusive model, see the options that they offer at Fetlife.com I don't feel like I am rendered invisible by their system like I do with OKCupid's.

      Thank you,

      Jasper

      REPORT THIS COMMENT:
    • Jessica James DAVIS, CA
      • about 3 years ago

      The categorization of people's identities is in itself an issue of prescription. But if you are forcing a label, then one should have respect for the complexities and spectrum of identities. You wouldn't use one given word to describe hardly any aspect of your identity, so why must you choose one out of two specified words for your gender?

      REPORT THIS COMMENT:

    Develop your own tools to win.

    Use the Change.org API to develop your own organizing tools. Find out how to get started.