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E commented on the article |I am a survivor of parental abuse, which still continues today. I suffered physical and psychological abuse from my parents throughout my entire childhood, even putting me on the defensive once where I was charged with battery. The charges were dismissed (my mother was trying to trash our home and break everything I owned and I restrained her and acted in self-defense), but the scars remain.
It has taken me years, but finally I was out. I can't tell you how many times I resisted calling social services (I should have and I regret not calling) as a child, or how many times I packed my bags and set off with my Lion King backpack, vowing to live off the land and never return to that place. At age 18, I had a car and told my parents to go to hell.
I also have type 1 diabetes so between college, living expenses, and my medical bills, I was in a pinch. To make matters worse, my mom threatened to cut me off the health insurance if I didn't "make things right." The only reason I survived any of this was due to my boyfried/fiance/best friend/ and partner of three years. His mother allowed me to live with them until I could get on my feet.
My mother blames him for everything, just as in this situation. However, I graduated with my Associate's Degree and made it on to the Dean's List. I have survived addiction, self-harming, suicide attempts, and the gruesome and tragic loss of my best friend, all thanks to my partner. He is my rock and he should be given a medal. Instead, my mother calls him a coward and hates him.
I once randomly flipped to a page in Oprah's magazine where Dr. Phil dolled out advice to a similar situation. He said that in my situation, it's my prerogative whether or not I ever want to even see or talk to them again, and whatever I decide is best for me is just fine and the right decision. It was so empowering that I broke down and cried in the drugstore where I was reading.
I hope this girl can shake this off, even though I can only imagine how hurtful it must have been. I hope she also knows that she can choose what is best for her and feel good about it. You can reinvent yourself every second of your life.
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