Kate Apgar

Recent Activity

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  Kate commented on the article | over 2 years ago

  Sweet Sibling Short

  Thank you Dora,

  
  

  And AANE....I want my soon to be 17 y/o to avoid the confusion that an NT world subjects him to and fly on the skills he has.  My heart to the family in the film on their honesty but especially to Tom.  He must be pretty damn amazing in his emotional and coping skills to persevere throughout the confusion (on everyones part) and the depression that Tom surely felt.

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  Kate commented on the article | over 2 years ago

  Violence and Bullying: What happened to Sean Carter

  Norah,

  
  

  Thanks for sharing your experiences. They mirror what my son went through including the episodes of depression and suicidal thoughts. I hope you got the support you needed.  I took my son to therapy (all the while feeling very pissed off that it wasn't his problem) and that helped him a lot. Trying to address the problem at school was like wrestling with jello.  The abuse was so varied and sometime so subtle, it was hard to know where to start in order to stop it. Add into this equation a lack of understanding on my sons' part of the social behaviours of tweens/teens and what could have been considered a minor joke (to some bystanders - let's say teachers or school officials) would escalate to non-stop teasing for days that would result in meltdowns from my son.  And due to the lack of understanding on his part, trying to get him to describe what built up to this result was extremely frustrating.  Teachers and administrators would shrug their shoulders mystified as to why he reacted the way he did. It happened over and over until he was "that" kid and I was "that" Mom.  My son tipped the scales by threatening violence to others which is when school officials acted and suspended him.  Luckily we had just received his dx'd and the school decided to handle the situation with kid gloves and discretion. He received in-house suspension for two days (and yes, I just said that with sarcasm since he was being punished for being abused).

  
  

  The good news is that the situation did improve some throughout the years.  He has a small group of friends, his understanding of social behaviors has developed and matured (and I must say they are far and above those of his classmates, due, I suspect to his abusive experiences) and he is no longer a major target for bullying.  School officials now hold a yearly session on bullying for parents to attend.  When asked by a school administrator (who proudly informed me of this session) whether I was attending or not, I told them we were already experts and didn't need more education. Yeah, I'm a little bitter...

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  Kate commented on the article | over 2 years ago

  Back on the Road to Find a School

  Well step one is easy (ha!), get the evaluations done.  That should buy some time.  I would also arrange private evals on my own dime. Between the district evals and your own evals you might have a three to six month window to explore more options. And have a better understanding as to what the next steps should be for Charlie.

  
  

  Sounds like step 2 of exploring alternatives has been done and found wanting.  So how about thinking outside of the box and starting your own alternative? (Yes, I know this sounds glib.)

  
  

  But seriously? You have met a great many people online and in person around the world.  You have a university setting and students.  There has to be a way to tap into these resources.  A charter middle/high school with hands on training for the university students? Tie it into a job training/coaching program? Copy some of the life skills programs that some universities are introducing for thier ASD students? 

  
  

  I know you have (we all have) thought about it because while early intervention and IEPs are all well and good, they have a finite time.  And as Beth above mentioned (waves from another late dx'd aspie teen Mom), no one ever stops learning.

  
  

  Oh and ps....the Southwest Autism Research & Resource Center has started up a program for teens now.  It looks interesting - another program to model after?

  
  

  Good luck to you guys and keep us updated (as if you wouldn't : )

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  Kate commented on the article | almost 3 years ago

  US College Programs for Autistic Students

  I believe the UofA (Tucson) has a program. 
  
  Marshall College (CA) too.
  
  Keep them coming when you hear of them please?  My guy will be heading off in two years (fingers crossed).
  
  Thanks
  Kate

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  Kate commented on the article | almost 3 years ago

  Arne Duncan and Special Ed

  I thought that link was a little wonky : )
  
  So here are my concerns (for now)... I have been informed that my son's AIM's results will be dismissed in our district due to his IEP (and despite his cognitive tests) and yet my son reaps no benefits from spec ed.
  
  I think that maybe we all need to explore this?
  
  regards
  Kate
  
  

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  Kate commented on the article | almost 3 years ago

  Arne Duncan and Special Ed

  Kristina,
  
  The link from "incidents" goes to Autism Speaks...I am pretty sure you didn't mean to go there?
  
  In regard to your article, could you broaden the discussion on standardized testing for spec ed students?  Although my son has an IEP and a case manager, he is mainstreamed and I thought he didn't fall under the spec ed category.  But I was informed by his case manager that although he will be taking the AIMS test next year, his results will not be taken into account with the whole student population.  I am bemused by this since he tests above average according to the district, state and nation comparison.  I am trying to figure out why they won't include him and whether there will be detrimental fall out from this? 
  
  Thanks
  Kate

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  Kate commented on the article | about 3 years ago

  School versus "The Real World" in Accommodations

  Having just been to yet another IEP meeting with my teenage sons' teachers I have encountered this many times.  It has reached the point where I just "know" which teachers take that attitude - sigh.  These type of teachers are so rigid in thier thinking that we end up accomodating them - ironic, no?
  
  I wish we could use a better word since "accomodations" seems to be defined as special treatment to some. I've had teachers sneer at me, written on reports or stated in meetings that they didn't believe in my sons' diagnosis and his very real need for some specific accomodations. They treated me as some sort of "helicopter parent." And I am the adult in the situation, imagine how they treat a child!
  
  It is truly frustrating to encounter this attitude.

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  Kate commented on the article | about 3 years ago

  Insurance and Autism: Not Just For ABA?

  But I wonder if it's not time----or, rather, that it is simply time now----to broaden and shift the discussion about autism and insurance, to be more about different therapies and age groups and less about getting in so many hours of therapy for a young child.
  
  Kudos for this.
  
  You know my son's story - dx'd at middle school - so we completely lost out of the EI, etc. and are now in the "transition IEP (also known as we abandon your 16y/o and brush our hands off)"
   
  My guy deserves more.  It's not his fault he can't figure out executive functions and yet tests cognitively great....the public school system can't handle teaching and adjusting for that and the myriad challenges of an Autism Spectrum Diagnoses.  And because the school system failed him , he won't be able to figure out the SSDI - due to the assumption of incompetence on behalf of his legally mandated educational system and the assumption of some competence of the behalf of SSDI.